Saturday, February 11, 2012

Week Five

Originally posted on March 9, 2008

Week Five

Current mood: complacent

First I must apologize, I'm usually good about getting back to people when it comes to e-mail or PMs. My body clock has been totally out of kilter and if I read something late at night or early in the morning, I plan to reply later in the day. I've been tending to forget to get back, please don't take it personally, it's just me. I'll try to get back to my old routine.

Long range plans for last weekend were to go to the Speedway Expo in W. Springfield, MA. I didn't care about the Expo as much as seeing old friends. But I had to cancel out. Driving is still painful and there is way too much standing and walking involved. Plus the roads in W. Springfield are some of the worst in New England, after this winter, I can image the potholes are large enough to swallow a small car. I was hoping it would be my first public appearance. Wasn't happening. Not a chance.

I did spend Friday night and Saturday night watching the Discovery Health Channel, as my favorite of all of their specials was on, Sex Change:Him To Her. It was only the 11th and 12th time I've watched it. They so other similar shows, but this one is by far my favorite. I got to see my doctor, Dr Brassard and the hospital I was at. The residence featured is now closed for the new one, next to the hospital. One of the girls featured, Annah, reminds me a lot of myself, excluding the fact that she's gorgeous.

Sunday I was speaking with a good friend of two years, Judi, when she mentioned that she and her wife Mikayla, were flipping channels and said that the saw Annah, very casual like, almost like Judi knew her. I said "You know Annah?" She replied that they did and that Mikayla was at the hospital/residence the same time Annah was there and that the special was filmed. I've spoken to Mikayla about this special several times, and she never once mentioned knowing Annah.

I had figured Annah was just living peacefully somewhere in the southwest, trying to remain anonymous. but Judi told me Annah had a website and such. So naturally that night I did a search, found Annah's website and that she had put out a book. And in the photos section, there was a picture of Mikayla. Small world. I've ordered the book and wrote to Annah. I was thrilled to find her, almost as thrilling as meeting a Beatle. I did get a short reply. Short, but still way too cool. And talking to Judi and Mikayla was great, as usual.

I did watch a few other specials about SRS on Discovery Health and noticed one key thing. They all show what leads up to surgery, surgery and then shows the patient many months later. Absolutely none show the living hell of the first few weeks. Minor things like the stent, catheter, penguin walking, dilating, struggles to get up, etc. That's a very key part they left out!

Tuesday I went out for a short bit, driving still hurts and getting in and out of the car is quite the chore still. But Tuesday night I wanted to go to Anne Boedecker's support group. I had read a few things in the Nashua Telegraph that had me concerned for two of the individuals that are usually there. I cheated and took a hot bath before going, which made the driving a bit easier to take.

But just as my luck would have it, the two people I wanted to see, weren't there, but two new people were. Sitting in the group for roughly 90 minutes was painful. No, not the group I was with, the actual sitting was torture. One of the new girls wanted to go for coffee and talk. She had heard a lot about me and wanted to meet me. So we met for about an hour after and found we both have a very common bond, an extreme love of music and the musicians that make that music.

By the time I got home I was in pain. As I went to change, I pulled down my pants and underwear and found something I hadn't seen in weeks. A ton of blood . Admittedly it scared the heck out of me. But after cleaning, dilating and taking my last bath of the day, I couldn't find any residuals. Even the next few days there was no sign. I'm guessing I popped one of the self disolvng sutures,but for a few hours it certainly had me on high alert.

Wearing any form of underwear is uncomfortable and I wear it only when I'm going out. Getting out of a chair or bed is still not by any means easy. Bending is still avoided as much as possible.

Friday I got to speak to Clarissa & Wendy, the couple I had met in Montreal. They were having a down day a needed an ear. Thankfully by the time our call ended they sounded brighter.

Saturday I was planning a quiet day, but my friend Linda asked if I wanted to go to the Monarchs game. Despite the all day heavy rain, I did want to get out of the house and seeing Linda and her boyfriend Rich was a good excuse to get out.

I arrived downtown early, hoping to get something to eat, but the game was on and it was a Saturday night. Everything was jammed. I went into JT Hills Sports Bar, because I usually know a few people there. Not this day. I couldn't get a seat, but ordered a vodka & cranberry and stood to watch the Syracuse basketball game. After a few minutes, I noticed, John had no problem being in a bar alone. Cynthia had no clue how to act or what to do. Wow, this next year is going to full of learning curves.

The Monarchs were horrible, but I did get to say hello to some friends that I haven't seen for sometime, Linda & Rich, the Dyers(the couple that sat in front of me the five years I had season tickets), The Boisverts (racing) and the Pendletons (Lexy's mom & dad, two awesome people) But that walking and moving around helped because sitting in a seat for three periods of hockey was more than I could have handled.

I was sore upon arriving home back not as bad as expected. I did wake up in the middle of the night feeling it though. I'm still feeling it today.

Tomorrow will my first day (1/2 day) at work. It'll be good to start to get back to my normal routine, but having a desk job, I'm fearing the sitting and walking. Guess I'll bring the ice pack.

The View From MySpace

You need to learn how to take it easy gurl!! LOL (as if I listen to my own advice, NOT!!)
I hope everything goes well for you at work tomorrow.


Good luck back at work tomorrow! TAKE IT EASY!!! I do have to say, however, that I am almost as anxious as you are for you to be better - seems like it's taking FOR-EV-ERRRRR! Well worth it though, I'm sure! x0x0x0x0x0x0


Best of luck to you at your first day back to work!! Look beautiful and don't forget the ice pack! Hugs to you! Miss you lots!!


Please do be careful, Cynthia. Your bits are very delicate now!!!


wow.....i cant believe you are ALREADY going back to work! Take it slow, DO NOT push yourself..nurse's orders! As much as it will be good for you to get back( I know you are bored as crap at home!) don't try to do more than you should...


still haven't seen Sex Change: Him To Her but hopefully I'll get to see it at some point.

I hope your first day back at work goes well today! :)


It was great talking to you the other night. I'm glad we were able to get you in touch with Annah. She is a great lady.

I am concerned for how much you are pushing yourself though. I understand having to go back to work, but sitting through a 90 min. meeting and then continuing for an hour more was pushing it. Take care of yourself or it's going to knock you on your ass for sure and you won't even be able to work 1/2 days. Being there for others is great but take care of yourself FIRST!!! Love you hun. I hope to talk to you soon.


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