Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Larger Suitcases & Withdrawal

Originally posted January 13, 2008

Larger Suitcases & Withdrawal

Current mood: blah

Well it looks like I'll need a bigger suitcase going to Montreal. Good friends are showing how good they are. On top of the previously mentioned stuffed moose, I now have a friendship plaque and guardian angel to come with me.

My friend Melinda and I became friends the reverse way. Unlike today where people meet on online, then later meet in person. We actually met at a Jabbers show first, and became great friends online. Despite her own physical troubles, sent me an awesome friendship plaque to take with me. Her handwritten letter was even more inspiring.

One of my two guardian angels, Michelle, gave me a guardian angel holding a cat (here kitty, kitty) to take with me to watch over me. People have accused me of someday becoming 'the crazy cat lady', time will tell. But they are probably right.

Michelle is also a Mod Chick Mafia member. Because I'm the one that worries about the others, takes the others problems and pain too much to heart, is very protective of the others, and I'm the oldest (grrrrrrrrrrr), it's become a running joke that I'm the MCM mom. After I was more concerned for the others having a good time at our holiday dinner, Heidi thanked me for " being a good mama...."


That was like way cool and gave me the biggest smile I've had in a long, long time. Sounds dumb, but it's not to me.

For surgery, I had to quit all estrogen a week ago. I was taking 6.25mg a day, which is five times higher than a high dose for a genetic female. Withdrawal SUCKS. Granted I knew that from an ordering screw up last January, but this has to last longer and will be for another three weeks. At least the last week I'll be on morphine and won't care.

Estrogen withdrawl is exactly what women get during menopause. The temperature fluctuations are hell. The non-stop migraines are even worse. I've been swallowing Extra Strength Tylenol like they are M & M's, and they are about as effective as M & M's would be. Concentration is non-existent. I'm in living hell.

I had lunch with a good friend Andrea today, but the last half became a struggle with a pounding headache. Only good thing to come of it is, Andrea is going to Thailand for surgery in April so she can learn from my fresh experience what to prepare for. Funny thing is, I always considered her to be the"big sister" but this time she's learning from me.

Countdown is on. Eight (maybe seven) working days until surgery and exactly fourteen days. It's time to stop looking back at the past, and start planning for a brand new future. The only thing coming with me into the future, will be my true friends.

Thankfully, I have plenty of them and some of the bestest in the world.


Now if I could only kill this stupid headache.

1 comment:

  1. I swear to god the estrogen withdrawls felt like it was going to kill me, or someone else